The Test 

on the Frequently-Used Terms

Various typos

Miscellaneous terms

"Naughty" terms

The Test

Have you learned anything out of this page? This test, provided by Linda, will prove, LOL. Well, actually, we just thought it was hilarious, LOL...
   As any modern-day educator knows, a good test is known by an acronym. I started to call the AY Discussion Group Test of Alexei-Related Terms (TART), but that doesn't sound too classy. And we are nothing if not classy. So I'll just call it the Test of Alexei-Related Knowledge (TARK). I'm sure you will all pass your TARK test with flying colors! :)

Linda


VOCABULARY--Choose the best definition for the given term.

1. thights (noun, plural)
A. what Sylvester the cat sees
B. parts of the human legst between the kneest and the hipst
C. name given by hyperventilating board member to form-fitting pants worn by Alexei in the legendary Sun Valley Gladiator performance
2. confuged (adj. related terms, confugion, noun, confuge, verb)
A. affected by digestive discomfort brought on by comsumption of too much chocolate (Ex.--All that Godiva candy got me so confuged I had to take some Milk of Magnesia.)
B. delirious from listening to too much Bach. (Ex.--He’s just toccatta quit listening to all them fugues. It’s making him confuged.)
C. disoriented; usually as a result of overexposure to stroking, thuds or rolling on the ice, and often indicated by utterance of "Oh, dear!"
3. keepership (Noun)
A. an apiary’s yacht
B. any desirable sailing vessel
C. claim staked by board members to various endearing personality traits, physical attributes, program elements or personal possessions of their favorite skater
4. clod drink (noun)
A. any beverage consumed by any boorish adult male
B. beer-like beverage derived from sparkling mountain water and just the right combination of clod hops; named for the tendency of mountain folk to over-imbibe and drink from their work boots.
C. any beverage used by any AY Discussion Group member to restore normal heart rate and body temperature after viewing of any Alexei Yagudin performance involving any combination of thuds, P.T.’s and Russian stroking; may be drunk or poured down front of shirt to achieve desired therapeutic effect.
5. Frozen Anna (proper noun)
A. tragic heroine of Russian literature (before she met Count Vronksy, that is)
B. intrepid AY fan and board member on quest to buy new boots during trip to Russia to see favorite skater compete in Russian Nationals and keep other board members updated on results with timely resports
C. drink named in honor of said board member
6. Russian stroking (noun)
A. term for method by which skater gathers speed preparatory to performing major element, so named in honor of high level of skill achieved by Russian skaters; may be performed backward or forward
B. same, but performed while ice skating (this one really needs a gavel, I know..)
7. One Banana (Proper noun)
A. snack given to Curious George by the Man with the Yellow Hat
B. ingredient in Frozen Anna
C. exhibition program performed by Alexei, pre his rolling on the ice days
8. Complete the analogy.
triple Axel is to thud as rolling on the ice is to __________ (Answer: "Oh, dear!")
MATH

1. Kim leaves West Virginia for Sun Valley at 8:00 a.m. Eastern Time, traveling at a speed of 80 mph. Laurie starts packing at 10:00 a.m. Pacific Time and leaves California ten minutes later, traveling at a speed of 55 mph. Two hours after that, Kim has to return home to get something she left off her list. Assuming that there is no highway construction, no detours, no headwinds, and the weather is clear, at precisely what time will Laurie and Kim spot the first Alexei hair-flick?

2. Ina starts a thread entitled "Russian Stroking: It’s Not Just for Russians Anymore."
What will be the average number of gavels Anita will hand out per post on the first page alone? In case of half-gavels, please round your answer up to the nearest whole gavel.

3. Into how many pieces may one average sized male Russian skater’s body be split up in order to accommodate keeperships by members of the AY Discussion Group? (This question also satisfies the biology requirement of the test.)

HISTORY

1. In fifty words or less, explain the historical importance of the phrase, “The Podium Shot heard ‘round the world.”

2. Which of the following is NOT associated with Roosevelt and the New Deal?
A. WPA
B. CCC
C. FPW
3. Who is the most feared Russian among AY Discussion Group members?
A. Ivan the Terrible
B. Peter the Great
C. Igor the Ignorant